Reason 124 why I should get around to getting contacts!

Shoveling in a winter wonderland

This is me at 8am today:

Thrilling pic isn't it folks? I changed it to black and white just to illustrate just how much white there is out there. We have had a little frost but up to this point we haven't had significant snowfall. When I got up this morning my Mum, brother and I had coffee and listed to the radio...we heard mention of many school closings and got all nostalgic for the days when we would pray for snow so that buses would be cancelled and our school would be closed. Now that we are all grown up (so to speak) and working, there is never that same sense of wonder and pure awesomeness that we could just play all day. Offices tend to close far less frequently than the school board. But I have to say that I have had a pretty successful day so far. I helped to shovel two driveways and two walkways, drove up to the gym and sweated my face off for an hour, started tidying up, blogged...although I haven't showered yet and I smell like I have sweated for over an hour. ick. Anyway, today one of those days where I wish I had someone to snuggle up under a warm blanket with. BUT I don't and you know what? That is ok.

A Blustery Day in the hundred acre wood

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OK tis a bit of a fib as I don't actually live in the hundred acre wood, but it sounds cooler than titling this post "blustery day in apple country". Winter is really on it's way. I know how boring to talk about the weather eh? But we have had a few freezing cold days as well as some days where you can just watch all the leaves blow off the trees. I am hoping that it is less windy closer to the city cause it makes for crappy driving. I am heading out soon to take my Nan down to the GTA (Greater Toronto Area) to visit one of her friends. This works out awesomely for me as my cousin is on mat leave still so I am going to go visit her and play with her darling daughter Abby. Being such a crap cousin, I haven't been to visit her in the 6 months she has been alive. Finally getting out of my slump and having an excuse to visit now I really can't miss out. It is weird now suddenly to be so far removed from the baby having set. Being married I felt like I was one step closer to that. It wasn't as if we were planning on having one anytime soon, but I sort of felt that I had made it over one hurdle. Now I have to start back at the beginning...which I realize isn't really a bad thing. So now I get to put all my love for the youngans into my cousins baby and those of my friends. This is even better cause it means i still get a good night's sleep and I change way less diapers.

B is for boyfriend...and like bad mistakes I have had a few

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Hurm, re-reading the title I see it now doesn't totally work. I was going for a witty Queenesque nod but tis not quite right. Oh well we're stuck with it now. Carrying on with the encyclopedia of me theme is the letter 'B'. I guess pretty appropriate for me right now is "Boyfriend" If I were to sit here and discuss the many boyfriends/doomed relationships I have had in the approximately 10 years I have been dating I would develop carpal tunnel syndrome. I think as an adolescent a lot of my issues stemmed from wanting to be liked. I wanted boys to think I was pretty and cool and so my standards tended not to be the highest. In fact I brought home quite a few doozies and scared my parents to death. In fact upon reflection, I don't think I ever really dated anyone that treated me properly, or really loved me. I mean I guess they did in their own way, but it was never in the way it is supposed to be, the really unselfish way. Regardless of this I still ended up getting married at 24. Needless to say for various reasons it didn't work out. Due to my previous track record I have decided that the next man I seriously date will need to meet certain expectations. I am looking forward to dating again, but I think I need to really examine who I am dating and to make sure it is for the right reasons. Right reason "I am falling for you cause you are super awesome and worthy of my awesomness" Wrong reason "I am lonely and tired of being single". To help me figure this out I have developed an almost Bridget Jones like list of qualities that FB (future boyfriend) must possess:

....He can make me laugh, isn't a whiner, gets on well with both my family and his, my friends approve, he can cook, is handy around the house, knows how to do laundry, is healthy, loves to travel, ingrained sense of adventure, spontaneous, brings me breakfast in bed (on occasion at least), has a steady secure job, likes to kiss, cuddle and hold hands, enjoys reading, appreciates my sense of humour, sings in the car, likes roadtrips, takes me on dates, not selfish, smart, has hobbies, likes the outdoors, will eat my cooking, loves dogs, can enjoy a good chick flick, will take me to the movies, is handsome, writes me love letters, loves music, can make a good cup of tea, drinks wine, wants to have babies, likes photography, not more than a casual drinker, isn't jealous, will go out and have "guy" time so I can have "girl" time, appreciates Mel Brooks comedies, understands the deeper meaning in those Brat Pack movies from the 80s. (this one isn't a stickler)laidback, no mental baggage, will cut the grass cause I have allergies and have a hard time with it, romantic, appreciates how important both couple time and alone time is, can enjoy both a night in and a night out, makes my toes curl when we have sex....

I am sure there are more I have forgotten--anyone care to add to the list?

Also, on an unrelated note. My blog is ugly can anyone help me make it cuter?

Perhaps a case of the Mondays

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I am feeling very down and unmotivated today. I hate days like this. It is one of those days where you look in the mirror and say "I am fat, ugly and no one loves me" It is all in my head and total nonsense, but I just feel 'blah' today. I have been working really hard lately exercising, eating healthy, smaller portions etc, and the numbers on the scale refuse to budge at all. Being someone who's former idea of activity was exercising my brain by seeing how many books I could read...I had thought that going to the gym 4 times a week would cause something to happen. I think I am makin a bigger deal of it than it really is, but that is what happens on days like today. Everything gets blown way out of proportion! On a more positive note, I am listening to "Julie and Julia" as a book on CD in my car. I love it. It has also inspired me to start cooking a lot more--would anyone be interested to have me post recipies I am trying and my comments on them?

I had a really great weekend. Friday night I drove down to Orangeville and met my cousin for dinner at the Montanas. We haven't seen each other in ages so it was nice to eat and catch up...share a half litre of the Pino Grigo, tasty. On my way home I swung past another friend's house and managed to get talked into spending the night and catching up. We met in college and haven't had the opportunity to spend much time together as I moved to the States right after graduation. It really has been nice lately to get to reconnect with the people that have meant so much to me over the years. I do miss living in the US sometimes, but the good by far outweighs the bad at the moment. Saturday my friend Jen and I drove to Barrie and spent the day shopping. We met up with Cailey (a friend from home who recently moved there) and we made dinner, had some drinks, watched bad MTV shows and headed out for a night on the town. There is something so soul soothing about having a fun "girlie" night with likeminded chicks. As much as I like being single, I like it so much more when I am surrounded with single chicks...they kind of get it.

As crazy as it sounds, when I got back to the house on Sunday I learned that there had been a murder in Collingwood. I don't really know all the details, but we know the man who killed his ex son in law. Mum and I used to work for his wife...at one point they were somewhat close family friends. We haven't seen them much in the past few years but it is so surreal to think that we have spent so much time with a man charged with first degree murder. As I said I don't really know the details so I don't have too much of an opinion on the matter, but it just seems so weird.

Online Shopping Ain't What is Was

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There were many reasons I loved living in the States. One of which I didn't realize until this week. I have recently tried to shop on two of my fomer fave craft sites Chatterbox and Queen & Co charge $50 for "International" shipping. Of course I didn't realize this until I got all excited by cute new Scrapbooking items and filled my cart with goodies. I really don't see how they can charge the same to ship something to Canada as to Australia. I am so unimpressed. Stupid International orders. I guess technically it's a good thing as it saved me from spending money I don't have on Scrapbooking goodies, but dang they were some cute goodies.

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I am not too sure how much nerdlier one can get but I am currently blogging and uploading books on CD to my Ipod. I went to the local library today with the intent of getting books on CD. They have an absolute ton of books on tape, but that doesn't really help me at the moment. I am on a self improvement kick as of late and I guess reading at home isn't enough for me! I am taking some mini road trips as of late visiting friends and family before the snow falls and makes travel difficult...this way I can absorb more literature while I am in the car. It is strange because I am such a huge music lover, (always singing along while I drive) but today I felt like a change. I had a job interview this morning for an admin assistant at a local ski hill. While it is Sat and Sun work which I like to turn down, I have decided I can no longer be so picky while I am looking at $39 in the bank. They will get back to me on Monday but it sounded like they were excited about having me work for them. hurray. I think it will be good for me to do something new, to meet new people and maybe have the chance to network. I am having a hard time lately figuring out what I want and I think if I am at least doing something there is a better chance of me figuring it out.

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While I have already missed out on posting every day I liked seeing Lara's Encyclopedia of Me idea she stole from Stefanie..so for today here goes.

A--is for adult onset ADD

This isn't actually anything more than a self diagnosis really. I have such a hard time sticking to one thing. I need to have many tasks going on at the same time and frequently I lose interest in something I was just incredibly passionate about just moments before....

Starting Over

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I used to be quite the blogger, I would spend time every day telling the blog community things about myself and actually making a really cool friend in the process. Lately I felt like I couldn't write the truth. Not for fear of being judged, but I needed to keep some things private. My ex used to read my fomer blog and I felt that I couldn't write about what was happening and what was really going on as I didn't want him to read it online. Blogging is something that I want to do for myself and feeling that I had to censor what I was going to write made me develop severe writers block. Not cool. Well I am feeling inspired again and so without further ado I am back.

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Last year I heard about NaBloPoMo mid November and I was pissed cause I thought it would be a fun creative challenge to have to post every day. I thought...next year I shall do it! I shall be a super poster every day of November. Well today is the 8th so it looks like one more year I will miss out on getting the cool little icon in my blog. No matter, it is good to be back.

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Have had a really nice day. I took my Nan out for a coffee and grocery shopping, and then just came home and got some "homey" things done. Made some phone calls, wrote some letters, paid some bills. The things I mean to do that sort of get swept away each day only to pile up and make me nuts at the end of the week. I have recently become a gym rat. I pretty much do hate working out so this is quite a surprise to me. My friend Jen recently moved back to town and we decided that we should work out together. I really said yes as a lark but now we are going 4-5 times a week. I have wanted to work on my fitness (from couch potato to semi active at least)for quite a while and now it is so amazing to actually feel myself sweating and getting stronger. My routine at the moment is 30 minutes on the elliptical machine and then doing some core strenghtening exercises on the weight machines...I am feeling an improvement. I still want to crawl in to my jammies and bed as soon as I get home, but I think I am a bit thinner and stronger...lets hope it ups my metabolism asap! Suddenly though it is 5:17 and I have a gym date for 6pm! I am quite proud of myself though cause I managed to prep for dinner this afternoon so that when I get back I just have to throw the veggies on the stove and make some pasta. There are many ways I am changing my life at the moment, this seems to be one of the easiest!

100 Things about me/Things you may or may not care about

:::A work in progress:::

1. I have two tattoos and a bellybutton ring--me thinks I am done on the body modification front.

2. I have some form of reading ADD and tend to have 5 books on the go at once.

3. I would do anything for my friends and family.

4. At 18 I moved to New Zealand for 6 months.

5. I haven't spoken to my biological father in approximately 6 years

6. I am currently going through a divorce.

7. I love to sing in the shower and my car

8. I dream of being brave enough to do karaoke alone.

9. I can admit that right now I have no idea what I want to do when I "grow up"

10. I frequently buy wine based on the label alone.

11. When drunk I tend to think that smoking cigarettes is the best idea after.

12. The next morning I regret said best idea ever.

13. I am obsessed with checking the mail although I don't get many real mail anymore

14. In some ways I still believe in Santa Claus.

15. I think i have a cavity.

16. Finally at 27 I started wearing makeup and doing my hair.

17. Other than brushing it I now have three ways I do my hair. yay me.

18. When I was 5 I accidently knocked my best friends tooth out with a fisher price tape deck.

19. Then I cried harder than she did cause my Mum gave her the last chocolate freezie.

20. I lost my first tooth trying to open a packet of oatmeal cookies with my teeth.

21. I still sometimes worry about being "cool enough"

22. I want a dog really really badly.

23. Cheese is my favourite thing to eat.

24. I love kissing so much it should be a daily mandate in my life.

25. Home is where I am living right now, small town Ontario, I don't want to move away again.

26. Nikon D40 is my new love, I just need to learn how to work it better

27. 2007 is the year in which I finally learned how to cook

28. A psychic recently told me I will marry a man who has a strong connection to the west coast of Canada and I will have two children, let's see how true this ends up being.

29. I have never broken a bone

30. I have named every vehicle I have owned--right now I am driving 'Ruby'.

31. I seem to really procrastinate when it comes to blogging, journalling and other things I love like crazy.

32. I have recently fallen more deeply in love than I ever knew possible.

33. It is with my youngest brothers best friend.

34. Almost 2 years later am still going through a divorce...apparently it takes a lot out of a man to sign papers.

35. On a whim I went back to school for interior design and I love it.

36. Counting the two weddings I will be in this summer /fall (09) I have been a bridesmaid 8 times. and I love it!

37. At 28, the thought of being a parent still freaks me out.

38. Sometimes I worry I should be further ahead in life

39. I love listening to Records.

40. I am exceptionally good at keeping in touch with people.

41. I just bought a truck. who knew I would be a truck kind of girl?

42. I love scrapbooking but I seem to rarely find time to do it.

43. I own about 20 pairs of shoes but mostly wear just my two staples.

44. I am scared of the dark.